The Few And Far Between

The Drama III

2006-03-04T02:03:00.000-08:00

i wrote this like 2 days back... i mean i finished it. hahaha

Look up high to oblivion,
with serious informations;
tell me how you feel?

Wonders through this difficult,
series of convictions;
i won't claim my will.

For me its hope to seek
for you to forgive my every sins
you were my last needs...

Was this our first brilliance
When we have conversations;
in the air of space yet whole

is it true this is the very end?
is it found, is it forgiven then,
this is our shortest story..

blergh

2005-07-25T10:15:00.000-07:00

ehh babe,

i'm not updating here anymore ahh slow ahh here,

visit moi at Dzefro

the new hope

2005-07-01T21:44:00.000-07:00

My life is an over turn right now, been trying new stuffs, good stuffs. I feel much more free and less suffocating. The glares, them synic all of them now will be put behind.

Well i've been experiencing weird vibes around me and a couple of buddies, it almost felt fake. i feel as if i'm someone fake. but i won't make a change just to please others when neither of them means nothing but a single serving friend.

I realise i have lots of those, in my life. when they meet up with me they go like woah, What happened to you dude, and i'm like its all good, same ol' shit. I'm trying my best to be as calm as i can be. well sometimes its just about how you take things, especially when, what we are trying to get that we can't, we tend to lose it and things will get from bad to worst.

had a couple problems with Lan a couple of days ago, involving No Direction, and yan got pissed at how lan is putting his words to everyone of us. well to me theres no point of getting too aggro, well yan has all the right to be piss. but situation like this can just be let passed and so yan had his conversation with lan and bernard and i had my part of the conversation with lan, hoping just to let this pass us and will to change the whole entire feelings of one another. Sometimes its just super groovy hard to please every fucking one. But hell now everythings all good. Met up with the guys yesterday night, Yan, Awin, bernard, Ally and another person left early, and Me, Fad, Inn and Ewick stayed and walked aimlessly in town. Wash eye.. hahah cioow ah-lianster. hahah well as per norm, NO LUCK. better still... NO BALLS. hahaha but it was all good.

well i'm off to town to meet babe. dunno what the hell we are gonna do there, just melayankan jer la eh. heh..

Cheers peeps
Dzefro

20th is Final

2005-06-20T06:55:00.000-07:00

I might be away for awhile and won't be updating anymore.

so if i dun get to see you all my buddies and readers, brothers and sisters i wish you best of luck in whatever you guys are doing. heh.

to the rest that know whats happened? please do say a prayer. hope for the best for all of us.

and all my wrong doing to all, all wrongs i've said, i'm really sorry.

jadik jgn marah2 k.

Ya'll take care now.

Cheers
Dzefro

05th june pics

2005-06-17T07:49:00.000-07:00

Beautifully done ikay.

Well appreciated. thank you so very much.

Bernard fad and inn singing along baby..

Round up... all claps to ikay!

Was one of the best sets we've had. and thanks too all who was there.

will try to get our mp3's in here. waiting for mixdown and the new E.P will be out. so let me know personally or in anyways you guys can to book one yeah.

make love ya'll

Peace.

Hopeless Shit!

2005-06-11T07:21:00.000-07:00

200 miles away from home.
200 miles beneath this lake is where my heart belongs, but you don't care at all.
You wouldn't even smile if I were screaming as the water filled my lungs.
You demand to be chased for your love.
My desperate heart is far too weak to run for you this long.
But you don't care at all.
There's nothing I can do to draw you close to me.
Can you take this silence like a pill so I can breathe again?
I've been trying to ignore the best parts of you.
I'm still hoping that I'll be with you somehow.
Please be home tonight.
I'll die if I don't get a chance to make this just right.
I'm sorry but I can't forget about the way I feel every time you're here.
What would it take for me to be with you?
I swear I'd rip my heart out if you said you'd be impressed.
Please be impressed.
I'd go so far to please you but I bet you wouldn't care at all.
Hopeless love, please leave me.
This broken heart is far to weak to run for you this long.
Why don't you care at all?
I'm dying for a place in your heart.
Can you take this silence like a pill so I can breathe again?
I've been trying to ignore the best parts of you.
I'm still hoping that I'll be with you somehow.
Please be home tonight.
I'll die if I don't get a chance to make this just right.
I'm sorry but I can't forget about the way I feel every time you're here.
Hopeless love, why did you carve your home in me?
This broken heart is too weak to hold your weight.
And now I regret the day we met.
And help me forget your name.

Love lost in a hail of gunfire

2005-06-10T11:40:00.000-07:00

I've lured you, i tried loving.

It just dosen't seem to work right.

I was always with my friends. and you were always with yours,

I didn't stop you, so why take advantage of it?

and now you blame me?!?

what did i do? I was 5 meters away. 5 bloody meters, heh

at that time i felt like as if i am invincible.

like as if i do not exist. its like wow, isn't this something. eh...

but still you wanted this, you chose this.

and you left.

like what you said, Nightingale flew so far back that it lost its way to the ground.

Please don't blame me. I've let you go. what more do you want?

I've nothing left now babe. i must say i'm not happy being alone,

but it is way better to be alone than to be in heartache.

lets just grow out of it.

and both of us will be fine.

The way it is.

Cheers.

Good bye Nightingale.

Something i wanted to say for awhile.. i just can't keep it inside anymore.

johor kids

2005-06-10T02:03:00.000-07:00

Daphne love Derby

2005-06-08T01:16:00.000-07:00

Aware Rust and Repair.

Away
How hard can it be away?
I promise I'll be just fine
Avoiding the paths you take

You have to try to make this easy
You have to try (try) for me
Sometimes I'm scared that things could be
So much better than this
What's best is not right
Sometimes I wish that we could be
So much closer than this
But I won't look up when you walk away

Away
Just tell me you'll stay away
It's so hard to act surprised
You never look down when I'm gone

You have to try to make this easy
You have to try for me
Sometimes I'm scared that things could be
So much better than this
What's best is not right
Sometimes I wish that we could be
So much closer than this
But I won't look up when you walk away

not too good of a feeling i have.
not too good of a feeling i gave to myself. berggghhh

Before I Go

2005-06-07T00:45:00.000-07:00

Listening to memories.... Unwritten law :- Before i Go -:

Life hurts so bad
Don't want you sad

Just look back to
Good times we had
I'd give my soul for you I know

Want to hold you before I go
Before I go
I need you to know

I'm still alive in you
It's my time to go
Don't stay up late
I'm not afraid

And I don't want your heart to break

I know I've seen what's been unseen

Live fast, die young
It's part of me
(it's my time now)
Before I go
(it's my time now)
My soul is on it's way
(it's my time now)

I need you to know
Before I go

Jason mraz

2005-05-29T03:41:00.000-07:00

Addicted to - Jason Mraz - Wordplay.

I’ve been all around the world
I’ve been a new sensation
But it doesn’t really matter in this degeneration
The sophomore slump is an uphill battle
And someone said that aint my scene
Cause they need the new song
Like a new religion
Music for the television
I can't do the long division
Someone do the math
For the record label puts me on the shelf
Up in the freezer
Gotta find another way to live the life of leisure
So I drop my top
Mix and I mingle
Is everybody ready for the single, and it goes

Ah la la la la
They listen closely to the verse I lay
Ah la la la la
It’s all about the wordplay
Ah la la la love
The wonderful thing it does because
Because I am the wizard of ooh’s and ah’s and fa la la’s
Yeah the Mr. A-Z
They say I’m all about the Wordplay

It’s time to get ill
I got your remedy
For those that don’t remember me
Well let me introduce you to my style
I try to keep a jumble
And the lyrics never mumble
When the music’s making people tongue-tied
You want a new song
Like a new religion
Music for the television
I can't do the long division
Someone do the math
For the people write me off
Like I’m a one hit wonder
Gotta find another way to keep from going under
Pull out the stops (pause)
Got your attention
I guess it’s time again
For me to mention the Wordplay

Ah la la la la
They listen closely to the verse I lay
Ah la la la la
It’s all about the wordplay
Ah la la la love
The wonderful thing it does because
Because I am the wizard of ooh’s and ah’s and fa la la’s
Yeah the Mr. A-Z
They say I’m all about the Wordplay

Oh the bridge across the stream of consciousness
It always seems to be flowing
But I don’t know which way my brain is going
Oh the rhyming and the timing keeps the melody inside me
And they’re climbing till I’m running out of air
Are you prepared to take a dive into the deep end of my head?
Are you listening to a single word I’ve said?

Ah la la la la
Listen closely to the words I say
Ah la la la la
I’m sticking to the wordplay
Ah la la la love
The wonderful thing it does because
Because I am the wizard of ooh’s and ah’s and fa la la’s
Yeah the Mr. A-Z
They say I’m all about the Wordplay

Ah la la la la
I’m all about the Wordplay
Ah la la la la
Sticking with the wordplay
Ah la la la love
I love the wonderful thing it does because
Because of the ooh’s and ah’s and fa la la’s
I’m back in love
With the Mr. A-Z
They say he’s all about the wordplay

And to "You", trust me... You'll be fine by december. I Promise.

open the doors to your heart.

2005-05-29T03:08:00.000-07:00

She's up there now,

India her next destination ahahahah...

ouh well.. she has to werk.

and she'll be back later on at 4+am.. wooh.. pening kepala..

tomorrow i have to go for some medical check up and all.. wah lan..

than must take injection.. damn it..

i dunno what i'm feeling right now. excited, scared, pumped..

why ar?

here's something, " If an angel gets drowned over her own words and the fairy lost her wings, who will you turn to?"

will i be there still to watch you fly away. away from me?
and everytime you're tired you come down looking for me.
not this time, not anymore. i'm sorry... my shoulder is Given.
Given to one, million light years better.

The one day i will never regret.

2005-05-27T23:57:00.000-07:00

Left for Solat juma'at at 1pm. well 12.45 ahh...

than after met up with bernard. and we headed down to CCK to yan's shop. than to rika's jamming...

than sent everyone home.. heh..

well, i went over to her place yesterday night at around 3+am, well she was sick and her parents are not in so yeah..

she looks sooooo beautifull sleeping.. she looks so calm... hmmphm..

well woke her up at 6+ cause she supposingly has a flight at 9am to brunei. but thank goodness it was canceled.. hahahah

waited for her to get ready.. it was really worth while waiting.. she came out like a..... wow only la.

it was all good... i didn't do nothing wrong i hope.. and she was all sweet.

A night which i would wish for to relived..

The End of Heartahe

2005-05-25T23:09:00.000-07:00

Seek me, call me
I'll be waiting (x2)
This distance, this disillusion
I cling to memories while falling
Sleep brings release and the hope of a new day
Waking the misery of being without you
Surrender, I give in
Another moment is another eternity
(Seek me) For comfort
(Call me) For solace
(I'll be waiting) For the end of my broken heart
(Seek me) Completion
(Call me) I’ll be waiting
(I'll be waiting) For the end of my broken heart
You know me, you know me all too well
My only desire to bridge our division
In sorrow, I speak your name
And my voice mirrors, mirrors my torment
(Seek me) For comfort
(Call me) For solace
(I'll be waiting) For the end of my broken heart
(Seek me) Completion
(Call me) I’ll be waiting
(I'll be waiting) For the end of my broken heart
Am i breathing? My strength fails me
Your picture a bitter memory
For comfort, for solace
(Seek me) For comfort
(Call me) For solace
(I'll be waiting) For the end of my broken heart

The Dream Team

2005-05-25T02:52:00.000-07:00

The Dream Team people...

heh...

When there are many we are one, One Boys.

and somehow one girl driver... hail Rab..... racer... budak2 potong lampu....

home,,,

2005-05-24T22:40:00.000-07:00

Home.....

heh...

testing...

ok ok she's coming back today. sweet... called her yesterday but no answer, but she called back.. awesome shit happening there... jeles sak.. grrrr...

19th june KL per GenG? heheh... i hope she's joining.. ;p...

I've lost the hair liao, hmmph.. short like hell and i look like i'm 12. self praised. heh.. aku peh suke la kan...

shaved my janggut.. now feeling bold and all...

oh well... till 6++ pm she'll call to tell me she's safe..

till than..

cheerios...

Msn and Myspace... heh

2005-05-22T11:55:00.000-07:00

yes..... Myspace RULE!!!!! because of myspace i caught eye on you.. ;p

25th seems to be soo long..

2005-05-22T11:47:00.000-07:00

Ok back again to square one,

Woke up this morning over a bad nightmare,
It was about me hearing that a plane has crashed,
and 300 people were missing, how freaky was that,
sweating like a pig, thank god for yan whom called me like 12pm sharp asking me to help him out with he's shop. which i did eventually went.

I can't wait for Wednesday, to hear from her.
very boring at night hor..... need to talk2 mah...

anyways if things are smooth i'm planning and saving loads of money for my special date heh,.... i'm thinking of marche or swensons? which one more power ar? hahah

lost...

well i hope things are fun there, and i'm missing my baby sister.. omg...
anyways Edah(my baby sister) , if you're reading this Ibu sends her love and so is abah and the rest of us... love you adek...

i'm bored so what the hell right?

and she is soooo cute....

cheers

RED CARD!

2005-05-20T12:34:00.000-07:00

Had a blast today,

Played soccer with the boys, inn had trouble getting out of the court. funny moment sia, heh....

it was all good, musicians now trying to get fit.. heh. macam paham.

She left for bali when i was playing soccer, wanted to send her off but she said that its okay, and i'll get to send her off someother time since she flies for a living... "A living Bird" heh.
At least i had my last smile from you and i, okla from the messages and calls.
its all goood....

hey at least i get to hear her voice before she left.

I'm kinda still waiting for her call, she said she'll call once she settled down.
its like any moment now. heh....

Drum sticks ya.. dun forget.. :p my last words. am i evil or what.

ok ok
here's the story,

Me alif inn and zad, we were so called lost in sengkang/punggol. on a shuttle bus, and at this one particular stop inn wanted to get off so that we can take the feeder bus, so we all got up and got off the bus. well that is how it was suppose to be but nouh....

Alif dropped he's wallet and i had to like shout out to that stupid uncle to wait, like always all the apek driver will never wait so he started moving and splited us up... so i'm with alif and inn is with zad. but we stopped at the next stop and bummed into inn and zad in the feeder bus... how crazy was that... everyone was tired and all and shit like this happened. i should have sent you to the airport... but well you said no need and so i have to agree yeah? hahah :|

anyways take care and be safe....
i'll see you in five days.

May 16, Its just another Monday ah ehh...

2005-05-17T01:23:00.000-07:00

Happy belated May 16, its just another monday per...

ok ok

Got back from sentosa yesterday, played some beach soccer, swimmed abit. quarrel with the lame lifeguard. Aiyoh... Inn had problems swimming.. masuk NS sua.. but its all good fun.. Rab joined us later, right after the skinny dipping session is over.. woohoo... good feeling.... heh.

well till next time..

Dzaf.

Where? where?

2005-05-15T03:35:00.000-07:00

Hard day yesterday, it was a warm in the day. Wasn't perfect. Was a yan's house to try and kick his ass on winning eleven 13. I didn't know that it was out. heh, met up with seri after, And her 2 juniors, went down to town. insane crowds. I can't believe my eyes.

Went up for food, and guess what? the food court was packed. and in the end we waited for them kind gentlemens to leave the table so we could eat. In the end kakak Seri tu jer ah that actually had a meal.

slacked after that. THAN!!!!.....

it rained heavily.. wah.. piang. but its all good. had trouble moving from boarder to liat Starbucks. but made it afterall.

Best thing that happenned.

Me and Yan waiting for kakak Seri (sorry heh) to meet me, than we were approached by 3 guys, well 2 chicks and one dude who keeps calling me and yan abang. adoiii..

They were asking for donations for those couples, parents who SHOTGUN. ahh so they are asking for donations to help support these people who need help and bla bla bla..

At first the dude was doing all the talking and he kept calling me and yan abang right.. so it kinda pissed me off, so i asked him for his age and guess how old is the prick?...

he's like 28. Nb...

Than i told him off not to call me and yan abang.. aper tua sangat ke muke?

and one of the girls.. actually the cute one lar...

she asked me, this is how is goes...

Cute girl: Abang, abang.... abang ni Black Metal ehh?

Dzaf: What the ****?

Yan: *Giggles*

Dzaf: Do we look like one...? Ggggrrrrr

Yan: still giggling

Cute girl: Abit ah...

Dzaf: *silence*

Yan: *Silence*

Cute Girl: *Silence*

after that the dude got the clitch and said , ok la BANG terima kasih ehh..

Bang some more.. macam nak kene cium ngan kuda....

heh...
me and yan had a really good laugh..
i told seri, seri tells the 2 girls,
the 2 girls calling me abang black metal now.

how cool is that..? gggrrr

ok nuff i'm tired.
bye..

blog

2005-05-09T09:50:00.000-07:00

you know what sometimes things just don't work out as how they should be.

tried but it was no good.. and the nightingale flew without even looking back. and now its too late, its been said.

cheerios.

gone

2005-05-06T09:56:00.000-07:00

Haven't been feeling well lately,
I'm not sure really why.
but i'm feeling like as if something bad has already happened.
so i sure hope its nothing.

Gonna go settle my life once i'm secured.
even so if not, i'll just learn that life is always unpredictable,
But one thing that i realise, that my whole growing up life is screwed,
I totally forgotten about the one and only,
oh my....

I've let you down, i know. i have sinned.
And now i'm punished.
and i realise that you are always apart of me and all of us.
I seek forgiveness.
I'm down on my knees.
please forgive me.

I have not been fair to alot of people.
And i've cause hurt, I'm really sorry

i will never forget you.

Not ever anymore. be it in life or death.

oh lord, Forgive my sins.

P.s: Time is running out, and i hope that you are there for me. Hear me. hear my calls hear my love for the one and only.

anyways a good firebuddy is getting married end of the month. and i know that my ex sofyn is getting married next year. and i pray for the best for you guys. Lovely and a life time together. Wishing you guys the very best in life or death. never will you guys part.

take care guys
cheers
Dzefro

My life were better ended by their hate,Than death prorogued, wanting of thy love

2005-05-03T02:52:00.000-07:00

I do protest I never injured thee,
But love thee better than thou canst devise,
Till thou shalt know the reason of my love.
And so good Capulet, which name I tender
As dearly as mine own, be satisfied
be satisfied........be satisfied.

A plague a both your houses, I am sped

Ask for me tomorrow, and you shall find me a grave man

Wilt thou be gone? It is not yet near day.
It was the nightingale, and not the lark,
That pierced the fearful hollow of thine ear

Only you will know what this truely meant.

GO GO GO

2005-04-29T02:10:00.000-07:00

Your hands didn't move
well neither did mine.
New Years will bring
so much to say
but nothing comes out right
both of us left with out words
both of us lost in this world
it's softer than ever before.

And you were the outline
of everything you would become.
The keeper of there hands.
To hold you now
it is a far cry more than
anything that I deserve.

I'm waiting to give you
whatever the world may bring
I'd give you my life
cause I don't own anything.
It seemed like the bottom
was all that I had
until now
I'd give you my life
if you'd give me
yours somehow.

Your hands didn't move
well, neither did mine
New Years will bring
me to you.
I'm waiting it give you
whatever the world may bring
I'd give you my life
cause i don't own anything.
It seemed like the bottle
is all that i had
until now
I'd give you my life
if you'd give me
your somehow

Eighteen seconds before sunrise.

2005-04-29T02:05:00.000-07:00

Listening to: Bleeding Through ; Love lost in a hail of Gun Fire.

This is how i truely feel. Like screaming to the top of my lungs right now. News that i read, eyes that i've seen pain that we all have felt once before. i am still feeling it. fuck all.... here it is.

This was a fucking bomb
For a few second this place was armageddon
There was a fire fight"

You are the fucking disease
Another day, another memory but I have fucking failed.
I turned another lie into the work of a saint so where is the cure?
Hundreds of souls with the look of horror on their face
Now I rise from my knees
I will not live in misery
You won't take me
You won't take me

Now it's me
Now it's me
All that's left is a bitter taste of a life that was once so promising
Rather cut at the wrist than laugh about your mistakes
Sickness fills the air. another life that you wish you could fake
Your eyes will cut through me, but it's a risk, that I must fucking take
I must take
So where is the cure?
Hundreds of souls with the look of horror on their face
Now I rise from my knees
I will not live in misery
You won't take me
You will not destroy me
You cannot destroy me
And I'll fight you with every ounce of strength I have left, and I'll seal it with a bullet and a kiss.
So look at your fucking horror

Horror
I want to see your face
Show me your true face
I want to see your face
Show me your true face

My heart belongs to you, so save me
My heart belongs to you, so save me,
For the sake to give it away
Still beats,
Still beats inside of me
My heart belogns to you, so save me.
And my heart still beats
And my heart still beats
My heart still beats, so save me
My heart still beats

FUCK this feeling and i will catch my sunset soon, this time far from you.

Titled me down bebeh you're going DOWN

2005-04-26T04:29:00.000-07:00

Long gone now. take care. i saw your eyes. i know what you are, where you are. how you feel, how you take and how you say out your words.

missing someone is real but not when its already proven to my eyes that i'm no longer near your heart.

if that is how it is now, god forsaken my eyes for what i've seen. what i smelled and feel. NO MORE i will run this to you.

Not when my heart is being shattered. The nick i gave still stuck to you. and it will always be, but it won't mean a thing cause its not how its supposed to be.
Enuff is enuff. i shouldn't have forgiven you in the first place. i should have just let you go there and then. why wait for too long and let you repeat the same mistakes over and over and over and over and over again? i'm not game for you doll. I DON'T NEED YOU! DON'T NEED NOTHING FROM NOBODY, but myself to love. hah
You can piss on whoever you want now cause i'm not gonna be clearing my heart to you for your LUST with someone else.

enuff of that.

New Flash: to those who care:

No Direction is doing our 3rd E.P now. haven't got a name for it yet, but it is all our new stuffs with fad, We are currently finishing the music of the first song. its gonna take awhile, for Mr. hsiao po luen BERNARD, is out of town. Flew up yesterday to Hong Kong to spend time and his grand daddy's money there.. so yeah. i hope he comes back in one piece and not chopped up. lol... he will be back this monday. ouh gawd seems so long.. and i'm waiting for seri to call me.. girl you better call me real soon darlz.. gggrrr.. and we'll be doing our Photo shoot for the E.P poster this monday right after the chinese guy gets back... and more shoots for our artwork. we'll just hope tweet dosen't have to go home early again...

And we have the Tix for our next show, which is at substation guiness theater, 5th june, presale is $6/- and at the door will be $8/- so yeah. please do contact tweet, Bernard, Fad and myself for the tix. No point contacting hezwan, he won't know nuts. muahahaha busy in camp la that moron.

Gig in paradigm pic up. with JESSE IN THE HOUSE YA'LL

Everyone is done gaying around already liao... Thanks to syikin the daytona loser.

Explains everything aye? hahah

Tweet and Colin(Kate of Kale) before heading to their room.

Stop guessing, Its true.... most of us are gay... ehem.. NOT! well maybe for tweet. hahah

Foooohh ... a non mabok gig in a club... cool aye syikin.... support yahudi.. coke

Thats all FOlks....

WWWuuuuuussssaaaaahhhhh

catching tears thats not there,

2005-04-21T05:07:00.000-07:00

Listening to : Circa survive The glorious Nosebleed

Catching butterflies, Butter cookies are meant for you, lost with lifeless confusion is what left you and me apart from each other, in two different worlds,

Isn't this what you asked for when you hold him. In my eyes perfection you will be. but my heart tells me things whats my eyes have seen and what now my eyes are covering up to miss you, to still hold you. What makes you so scared? maybe you're mistaken for someone who cares.

I'm missing my baby sister badly. i hope you're doing fine down under. i'll try to get my ass down there by july. Didn't get to send jessie off to the airport. i promised her but than... hmmph.. she left without even calling.. it seems like she was in a hurry? *sigh* why?

Mon's Chalet was good.. it was all fun fun. met Shain and DeeDee, Farizwan and Yummie and more. its all good.

The Saddest Day

2005-04-17T08:51:00.000-07:00

The Saddest Day by Converge

This is a song that means everything abt that particular day. The day you put a tear in my eyes.

And we won't be breathing in that same sun again.
None of this will ever surface again.
How we get older, how we forget about each other.
And the angel falls to the sky.
Raised and colled she blessed this day she did.
And it rings our ears. She rarely flies anymore,
burden broke her wings. And I know this ghost,
i have seen it before.
Young it is the dying to fast, too soon, i'll be okay.
The air thins in the quick and our lips move but we hear no sound.
Every time you justify, another good in you dies.
Faith and fear sears me, and love and you pull all the right strings.
"How we get older, how we forget about each other" she said.
Entwined within the sadder of days.

This is my pain, this is my angst. not to the world, only to you.

What happens in the circle, stays in the circle

2005-04-15T03:53:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow is the show, and we(No Direction) is having our final practice tonight.
This is one thing abt me, i get butterflies in my belly the night before the show, but when it comes on to the exact time for the set, i will be ready and okay.

Ouh well, tomorrow we will be covering atreyu, for the fucking first time. i just hope that i won't screw it all up.. fingers crossed.

playing along side with a lot of other good bands. so must come. must watch....

i have been feeling empty lately, its like as if i miss someone, i feel empty without something or maybe someone.

Who are you? why won't you just come out and let me see who you are? or maybe i'm just being stupid. maybe its something/someone i must find on my own, a task only i can complete....

hmmph.......

I dun like the sound of that...

Its about time something was gained,

2005-04-08T01:44:00.000-07:00

Just got back from a 3 days 2 nights chalet with the boy and, seriously that made me happy, Awins( Sofyan's Gf) friends share the same BBQ with the boys and it was super cool. but only first night second night none of them came. ouh well. there was no BBQ on the second night anyways. Games was fun playing together with pals, i asked LIN to come but she can't, ouh well. But Zahidah made it. swweeeett..

At least the past 3 days i was smiling. but smilling won't be good enuff. Sometimes i wonder what did i do wrong and what happened? what we quarrelled about, what made us so far from each other. I don't remember anymore. I DON'T REMEMBER ANYMORE. and soon I WON'T REMEMBER YOU. and when i do, i've SINNED.

Don't lift a finger, Let me show you the only way to let this go....
Don't lift a finger, Let me help you, Hold you here until the pain it has all gone

I'll take care of you, have faith that when you call my name
I'll be there, I'll be right there
So keep breathing, Keep that sweet heart of yours beating
I'll be right there

Wind, there is none.

2005-04-01T01:52:00.000-08:00

You ask me to go, and now you say you are waiting?,

What manipulation is this? I was forced out.

BEGONE is what you said. well too bad now i'm really gone. as you desired.

Brightest

If you find yourself here on my side of town
I'd pray that you'd come to my door
Talk to me like you don't know what we ever fought about
Cause I don't remember anymore
I just know that she warms my heart
And knows what all my imperfections are
And she said that I was the brightest little firefly in her jar

And I just know that she warms my heart
And knows what all my imperfections are
And she says that I am the brightest little firefly in her jar

I guess our time is up. Its about time.

2005-03-26T02:20:00.000-08:00

Don't delete your entry, i'll delete my memories.
of you. there will be no you. no more forgiving.
no more sparkling eyes, no more dimple in my smile.

I am nothing and i will be longed by your scent,
But scent will i throw you away for what has been done, what has become of you!

Love is not for you, never be...

Is this really my words.

THESE WORDS ARE MINE TO YOU!!!

It's time, What did i do to deserve.

2005-03-19T23:44:00.000-08:00

Yesterdays gig was crazy, all the bands were insane including BOING!

oh well,

I have been experiencing good night pass few days. but definately not tonight. After the gig we went down to S11 and had a meal and after we(THE GUYS) went up tp Suhayl's house. chill and played PS2. i tried to get some sleep but i can't, have this stupid feeling that something was wrong and all. And when i reached home and call, yeah definately something was wrong. Don't worry dear you won't have to answer any of my calls anymore. Or you don't have to hang up on me anymore, cause i won't be on the phone with you. You can go and sleep over at that geylang lor 6 house. beside the prosties parlar and all. I don't mind. You told me this morrow, "you do what you want and i'll do what i want". i agreed. this already means i lost you. But its ok. if you can do it why not me? I still disagree in betraying you, but i guess thats what you want from me.

Since everything i do is Wrong, Than i am definately WRONG for you.

Whats Worst, Now Banished away to a far far away land.

2005-03-08T20:14:00.000-08:00

Engrave me with thy sorrows, Open the clock and relived for eternity.
With such suspense, an open mind ruled but lost at a Kings eye, and drowned by a kings Dream, For where or even Which do i stand in line for thee? Am i forgotten? am i ruined by your Lust? or am i just a shadow trying to flee the darkest world.

Save me From this Blood Guilt, My Body Must Die!

Cheers..
Dzaf

And happy international Womens Day. :p

What is your Muse?

2005-02-24T00:24:00.000-08:00

Your muse is a mouse, butterfly or lamb. Just like
you, it's sweet and innocent , and everyone
wants to hug it. Awwwwwwwwwwww!

What is your muse?
brought to you by Quizilla

My past

2005-02-16T11:37:00.000-08:00

One thing i figured out is that, Family is the best thing in my life. Without my Mom or my dad i don't know what i will become. My Parents supported me in my work, music and they just never stopped believing in me, i did lots of wrong to them but still my parents never stop to support me. i did so many bad bad things which i'm not proud of but still they will never give up on me. Thats is the one thing i will cherish my whole life, and when i'm ready to be a father i will follow in your footsteps, cause they are my King And Queen. so anyways my Pc was on wallpaper mode, and my abah and ibu saved alot of old pictures and my Pc suddenly was showing all those pics. and i remembered how much love they gave to me and my siblings. i'm not super close with my kakak (Older sister) but we're ok. and i'm Really close to my younger sister. I would risk my life for that girl hahah. Missing her so badly cause she is not in singapore, she studying in perth and i dun get to disturb her. jesse is there too, so one more lovely sister away from ME! aaarrrrggghhhh

here are some pics of me and my family.

My Abah, My Ibu, My Older sister, and ME!

My lovely younger sister.

Another younger SIS! SOOOOOO CUTE!!!!!!!!!!

Me and Younger sister....

Hunting myself to the drain

2005-02-07T22:30:00.000-08:00

Some Will Seek Forgiveness, Others Escape

I heard a voice through the dischord
Of a deluge of passers-by.
I saw one gaze frozen in time
Watching me passing by.
I swear I'll know your face in the crowd,
And I'll hear your voice so loud
When you're whispering...

Hey unfaithful I will teach you
To be stronger, to be stronger.
Hey ungraceful I will teach you
To forgive one another.

Here's my kiss to betray
Desperate to brush the lips of grace.
Do you feel hollow when you think of how I've lied?

Oh sweet angel of mercy with your grace like the morning
Wrap your loving arms around me.
Oh sweet angel of mercy with your grace like the morning
Wrap your loving arms around me.

Hey unfaithful I will teach you
To be stronger, to be stronger.
Hey ungraceful I will teach you
To forgive one another.
Hey unfaithful I will teach you
To be stronger, to be stronger.

Hey unloving

I will love you
I will love you
I will love you.

Love and how you see it Ruins you. DISFUCKINGHONEST!

2005-02-07T21:55:00.000-08:00

This is fake....
You are fake...
Love is Fake....
Nightingale had flew away.

DISFUCKINGHONEST

I saw the weather change its path, And Love was no more.

2005-02-07T01:52:00.000-08:00

Past few days was a jungle. Too many things happening. I saw something I shouldn't have seen. Sometimes tears can't show how much a person feel. How invincible I was infront of your eyes. I wish I was sitting 100 meters away, just for you to realize my presence. I guess things do happen for a reason. A reason to love, A reason to hate. Tears are painfull, full of disappointment full of deceptions. I wish you would turn your eyes, your face, your skin.

Cold shattered Night, I WILL STAND ALONE

The gig Musicnation was superb. It was really good... those who missed it...i'd say... Boy it was hell.. The crowd was so so wild... First on behalf of No Direction i will say thank you guys... organizers, Bands and the Crowds... Awesome... here's some of the pics live...

Tweet flying!!!

Surfing USA

hahahha this is wicked!

This one.. hahaha i dunno ar eh.. :p

All Pics taken from the Musicnation Gig in Republic Poly.

Musicnation

2005-01-31T08:56:00.000-08:00

Its Time to support the "Bands", Not The Words Said.

The who is what? with that whom? Its all in a puzzle

2005-01-31T07:49:00.000-08:00

Hanged out with the crazy ass bunch the last saturday. Went to TOWN.ouh gawd.. hahah met up with Alif, khus, Ayu and kyn in the train. but you know what someone had to be friggin late... as usual the Daytona loser "Shikin". hahah but its all good. when we reached town everyone hungry like ****, than had to wait for my good bro Tweet to come.. he said he will reach very soon and he is in bedok. Half an hour after kyn called he said he in the bus on the way.. freaked me out, lapar babe.. tak bleh tahan. Than 20 mins later he call kyn saying that he wants to go back first to change he's jeans cause "Barley" was spilled on him. muahahahah *padan muka* in the end we went to eat without him.. lapar sangat, sak :p.

Budak Budak Hanyut kelaparan.

Right Afta we took our last bite tweet came. wooh.... thank gawd. and than he ate. and so he ate...and ate. and hmmph.. ouh ya, if you go to lucky plaza and eat do not order the teh katai there... kene kencing manis sak.. super sweet.hahaha ok afta that tak tahu where to go so we head down to heren.. wanted to meet up with hikam there sekali when we reach HMV hikam and sham went down to borders.. what a set up hahah! than hunged out at starbuck somerset... hikam and sham joined us. Hang out.

Tweet and Me!

The One... too many.. hahah

The Evil Girls.

I am so M.C.P! gambar Chicks small ahh.. muahahah :p

The Guys! from Hanyut. Tak sachok Langsung! hahah

Waksegenn

2005-01-26T01:03:00.000-08:00

Esplanade is the most beautiful place only at night. with bands playing.. wahh shiok.. After the GiG meeting at Youth Park all of us headed down to esplanade. Aron wanted to go home straight cause he's too lazy to slack.. i think he wants to watch more porn. And so we headed to esplanade and The Lord inn told us that Mocha is playin...What a Set Up... hahha sedih.. anyways took a couple of pics with the crazy bunch but only a few can be shown here... so cheers..

From the Tv series "Hanyut"

An Angel that gave me Wings

2005-01-15T01:12:00.000-08:00

She said" Lets fly tonight.

i said" but i dun have wings.

"And she gave it by her words."

It a long feeling of doubting your loved ones, imagination can run really wild. well especially when you dun feel good abt what your paartner is saying, cause you kinda know that there's something hidden. * its called playing chicken".

ouh well enough of that, well life has been straight and been good. hanged out with the boys yesterday night at east cost. Was funny, sham was Berat on the head. me hikam and romi was not bad ah. well romi was riding like a crazy prick and scared twice the sheetz out of me. haha.

ok ok got jamming with my favourite band "No Direction"

To be playing in a band and playing live infront of Kids especially in the underground scene, there surely be kids who are your friends who respects you and there surely are kids that hate you, most of it are the bands. this band hate this band and that band hates this band. whats up with this? all of them are forgetting one BIG THING! that you are all making MUSIC! no matter what why must SG underground bands be so fucking unprofessional.
I know there are people, even bands, who don't really like me to the core. ouh well I'm making music and i now declare " I DO NOT HAVE A PROBLEM OR ANYTHING ABT HATING OR DISRESPECTING ANY BANDS IN SINGAPORE " i see you all as musicians. i don't see you all as foes and i will never, and if you all hate me than hate me all you can, cause i dun give a flying fuck! :) easily said... Screw fucking you.

It is now time to support the bands and not the people.

Cheers
Dzefro

cheers

Cross my heart and shoot it down.

2005-01-11T09:47:00.000-08:00

I HAVE NO HEART, I FEEL NO LOVE, No Fear, no joy, no choice.... no sorrow...... I'M HOLLOW

I am nothing now, so leave. Or speak at your last,
Say what you needed to.
and leave my heart,

Broken! SINNED!

Hit me hot heat and i have found myself and angel close to a fairy.

2005-01-09T11:46:00.000-08:00

You think by now i've learned
Play with fire
You'll get burn
But fire can be oh so warm
And that's why i return
Turn and walk away
That's what i should do
My head says go and find the door
My heart says i lost you

AND THIS IS "THE END"

2005-01-08T22:30:00.000-08:00

Now i will say the greatest goodbye to her.

GOODFUCKING BYE PAST!!! AND HERE COMES MY FUTURE!

Everything is my fault now ey?

2005-01-08T22:05:00.000-08:00

Are you happy now? ARE YOU? well i am. i may not straight away meet the person i wanna be with... but i'm sure too, one fine day! at least i know who i am and where my heart stands, LOVE, Sincerity, Challenged, PURE BETRAYAL! who gives a fuck about this anymore... who give a fuck about you anymore... who gives a FLYINGFUCK ABOUT ME? My Feelings?... Maybe this is what i get when i give out my heart too much to a girl and she just takes advantage of it,she will think that everythings ok once we meet or once we kiss or once she says sorry. WELL Too BAD Its NOT Happening, I'm not that weak anymore.
Why bother me? why even nudged me? we haven't heard from each other for 3 days or even more. so why bother? am i that prick whom you called a bastard?!? THAN A BASTARD I WILL BE!!
;but only in thy eyes... for thy shalt never see the real me ever again... a curse to thy eyes upon mine only grace to thee.. NOW LEAVE!!!! and let me be. to myself.

Now i'm okay (I Promise). Nay i shalt never be in thy eyes..

This time i'm Good "The very last time" I'll be good

2005-01-08T06:50:00.000-08:00

Saw a fairy the other day, thought it was fake, but actually i was faking myself. Now i'm sure of whats lost and whats here infront of me. And i don't want to force myself to call or message or even think about the past. I miss her, too much and i can't do anything. even if i can i won't cause...

Look you last for my eyes shall not look upon you Ever.

You are the weakest link... GOODBYE!

A mistake made, Once love, now Lost

2004-12-23T23:06:00.000-08:00

Now i've Learned:

Sometimes in life you tend to think you've found the Right person, but Nay. good things will never last. Loving is easy, but to maintain the love is the hardest part. love for a friend, a dear friend, love for a brother and love towards someone special.

I don't wanna hurt you anymore. Its my fault, i'm to blame. Those words are always said. To prevent whatever is to happen..

Being broken hearted. Is it a real feeling? Knowing you just lost your special someone... YES it hurts. It drowns me. Why cause i miss her? yes i guess so.

The one thing now that i can afford to do is to ignore my feelings and follow up on whats happening tomorrow... i know i won't be seeing her. but at least theres something new for me to feel. maybe even its because the era is changing! hah.

I miss you so much nightingale. But theres nothing that i can or will do to find you.

The return of One may not change abit, But everything.

2004-12-14T23:41:00.000-08:00

See this was when its without you.. we played our best.. we tried. but it wasn't good enough. now you're back, so make sure you'll make up for what was lost... and hope for the best. pictures are all over. thank you from the sexy keling mama (Jessie), On the 11th december we(No Direction) we suppose to play in an earlier show in Plaza Singapura but it rained so we were all quite happy abt it but it is for a charity event but still it rained so we didn't get to play. than we were stucked in the bus for abit to and hour i think cause of the stupid jamm in takashimaya. bitchfull many cars balls. had to rushed No Direction's set cause i need to cabut to the Mandai Zoo for some Tribal playing, (Good Money balls) and after that my arms felt like it was gonna break anytime soon. wooh.. than we all rested and went to shah alam in boat quay to MAKAN! woohhoo after that we went straight to ONE NIGHT STAND! boy was awesome balls. and the vocalists are amazing. do drop by and watch Sex in the city play balls.. hell outta time.

but still the guys (No Direction) altho hezwan wasn't there we still pull tru... just pray that we won't have to go tru this again.

fad and raymond acting mysterious...

Eyes, look your last! Arms, take your last embrace! With a kiss, I die.

2004-12-07T06:58:00.000-08:00

Than hate me when thou wilt, if ever, NOW,
Now, while the world is bent my deeds to cross,
Join with the spite of fortune, make me BOW,
And do not drop in for an after-loss
Ah, Do not, when my heart hath 'scaped this sorrow,
Come in the rearward of a conquered woe;
Give not a windy night a rainy morrow,
To linger out a propposed overthrow.
If thou wilt leave me, do not leave me last,
When other petty griefs have done their spite;
But in the onset come, so shall i taste
At first the very worst of fortune's might,
And Other strains of woe, Whick now seem woe,
Compared with loss of thee, will not seem so.

Hey you faithful i will teach you to be Stronger, to be stronger,
Hey you graceful i will teach you to forgive one another.
Hey you lovely i will love, i will love you, i will love you.........

The Past, THE END

2004-11-23T08:44:00.000-08:00

Take all my loves, my love; yea, take them all;
What hast thou then more than thou hadst before?
No Love, my love, that thou mayst true love call;
All mine was thine, before thou hadst this more;
Than if for my love thou my love receivest,
I cannot blame thee, for my love thou usest;
But yet be blamed, if thou thyself deceivest
By wilful taste of what thyself refusest,
I do forgive thy robb'ry, gentle theif,
Although thou steal thee all my poverty;
And yet love knows it is a greater grief
To bear love's wrong, than hate's known injury.
Lascivious grace, in whom all ill well shows,
Kill me with spites; yet we must not be foes

Hey....

Just got back for Tioman, insane trip ar. hahah the boat ride there was insanely crazy.. hahha Me and Brandon tahan tru out the flying high on speed boat. jesse and Nightingale vomited. My baby was so scared she hold my hand and never let go for the whole ride. haha anyways i was scared shit myself. hahah.
and when we reached got to our Super slack Chalet, slack till mad sak. but cool and cosy. well she enjoyed it. so if she enjoyed it so will i.*winks*
well we had a problem sleeping the first night cause we walked pass the creepy grave yard and we were all pissed scared that we couldn't sleep. hahaz in our room the curtains was playing with us, AND OUR WINDOW OPENED BY ITSELF!!!!! even when I personally LOCKED IT. spooky. and we heard gigglings hahah when every other chalet is dark and all were asleep. it sounded like jesse but she was sleeping... says brandon that is. hahah so shit man... i told my dear to get dressed and i said "i will count to 3 and than we run to jesse and brandons chalet" which was just across ours la :p than i started to count 1.................3 than i SIAM balls... hahah and i actually left her locking the chalet calling out my name. hahahah sorry sweetie. anyways woke brandon up and he said that he's toilet door was playing by itself and he couldn't sleep, as usual jesse is drooling than. hahah but i woke her up. brandon can't sleep cause of the door. the door was opening and closing by itself. and the door is heavy and the worst thing is the toilet dose not have a window for wind to go tru. WOOH!!! freaky... than me and baby took our mattress and slept over with jesse and Brandon.... me and brandon didn't sleep tru out the night ahah.. the first day i was there we rented a honda cup to ride around. rode off with my baby for a few sight seeing. it was beautifull riding with her... like ALI SETAN! hahah :p The trip was actually Superb waking up with my her, falling asleep with her, snorkling with her having nice cosy time with her..... wooh. all that i asked for.

Being with you was beautiful. catching the moon was simply beauty.
But do not so; I love thee in such sort,
As thou being mine, mine is thy good report.

Love you.

I killed a Fairy for you today.

2004-11-10T01:18:00.000-08:00

These past few days were awkward but i manage to pull tru. I hurt my Nightingale's heart the other day. I'm really really sorry dear. I didn't mean to hurt you. I love you so much princess. Will make it up to you k.. :) been going out with her with a blastic smile on our faces. I pray that this never change. hope everything will be as how it is. The kisses, the hugs everything... be it naughty or just angelic its all abt us. Will be going to jacks place soon for dinner with her than ah.. hmmph we are going SHOPPING!!!!! hahah and than... we are going somewhere and spend the whole entire evening till night falls and the break of dawn together. TOGETHER ALONE AT LAST! hahahah i will bite you all over baby! hahah like i always do :P. ok ok enough i'm tired... so bye?

Love you sweets.

SSSssshhhhh My lady, listen to the singing of the creatures of the Night.

2004-11-01T01:54:00.000-08:00

Spent my weekends with my Princess of Darkness, had a ball of a time. We just can't stop staring at each other, can't stop the kisses too. It was like WOW. can't stop thinking abt her. But still we are still new, still feeling very new but i love it. i'm actually falling for her. Didn't thought that i would anymore but i did with her. Its like a Virus!!! AN ADDICTION. ahakz, but anyways Dear i know you'll be reading this, so i'll just tell you again and again. Don't worry i won't leave, i won't walk away. And for sure i won't change my mind. Not with you. In your arms is all i think about day and night so stop worrying... or else....... i will bite YOU!!! muahaha anyways you get well soon.... and i will see you in your dreams baby... hahah ok till you get better.

Princess of Darkness shalt not worry too much,
for my heart has set down on thee.

Miss you....

Lonely hearts, Lost Kisses and Empty Words

2004-10-26T22:41:00.000-07:00

For whom you want me to be it shall worn me, How things will end and how will it start, i"ll be right here for thee shalt not leave till thy name comes. let them enemy swords plundge me to my lungs, for i will not give up my heart for someone who isn't worth of it.. by thy name i will find you oneday!

Time For A VACATION!!!! woohoo

2004-10-10T23:42:00.000-07:00

hey blog..

Haven't been writting for awhile was busy with a very very BIG Event, and thank god it ran smoothly and the clients are super about it. Sweet Lyntte leaving for Phuket tomorrow with her one and only Shawn, Wish her all the best in her thai-land-Tann.. hahah.

Ok now my turn... am preparing my vacation now. I will be going to..............
TIOMAN!!!! bought the tix for me and NADIA! woohoo.. She has been streesed for a very long time with tuition and school so i guess we'll have our wonderfull break there... EVEN! hahahah and joining us will be Better Than Run. and a few others i guess.. Will be cool cause we will be staying in a hut ( not everyone in one la, seperate ler... wait jessie and mich and babe wanna do threesome how? i dun want to get involve) hahaha so plans will be on the SUN, SAND and SEA! and good food... the dates are confirm. so we'll be leaving on 19th November.
I really hope Nadia would love the place cause she never been there.. hah Loser but yeah i guess when she sees the water she'll go WOOhOOOOO as usual. hahah. met up with her yesterday and hung out at bedok interchange for awhile.. it was crazy.. we went in GIANT and was runing here and there.. childish! and after we hung out at the skate park.. it was a sunday and a boring day i shall say..

Oh yah No Direction can't play this coming saturday. I have an event to do on the day itself :-( so sad but whadda hell its work. must take it seriously. hah....

will be watching The Exorcist this Tuesday or Wednesday with Nadia.. she'll freak out... hahah or maybe i will oh well.. maybe do something afta that... oh well till next time.

Cheers blog
Dzaf

Hopelessly I Love you Endlessly

2004-10-02T01:19:00.001-07:00

Its hard not to let that someone that is so special down. And when you did accidentally you hate yourself, so much. For All this years i've been alive i learned... alot of SHit and alot of hope. And i learned about love. Tho its hard for me to actually Love someone now after what happenned in my past, i still have to take the step forward and move. Whatever happens next is gonna be something new to be learned. I don't know whether she is the one. And i Don't know whether i should try or anything like that. At least now i've learned that honesty really pays off. JUST TO BE HONEST! But not everything will be fine just by being honest. No i have to disagree.

These are the questions running in my mind right now:

Who are you really?
What are your Motives?
What are your future plans?
What do you get out of this?
Why is this happening to me?
Why did god chose me?
Will you really Appreciate me?
Would you stay when i'm sleeping?
Where is this Road Leading?
Why Am I HERE?
What if we get lost?
IS THIS REALLY LOVE?
Aren't you scared of love?
I think I am don't you?
LOVE? LOVE? ARE YOU SURE?
WHY ARE YOU HERE?

I'm Scared...

Well enough of these...
Nadia is having a bad day. muhahahah anyways Nadia RELAX AH BABE!
Chill K!

Take the quiz: "how bad do you need sex"

cherry
Not sex crazy basically NERD

A fairy Song

2004-09-27T23:28:00.000-07:00

Over hill, over dale,

Thorough bush, thorough brier,

Over park, over pale,

Thorough flood, thorough fire!

I do wander everywhere,

Swifter than the moon's sphere;

And I serve the Fairy Queen,

To dew her orbs upon the green;

The cowslips tall her pensioners be;

In their gold coats spots you see;

Those be rubies, fairy favours;

In those freckles live their savours;

I must go seek some dewdrops here,

And hang a pearl in every cowslip's ear.

by William Shakespeare

Wonderfull.... Restecpa!

The Fighters of Toys'R'us

Do i look like Elvis Or Am i just a Sinner in your Eyes

2004-09-26T09:44:00.000-07:00

Hmmph.... *sigh*

Been Awhile... tiring... werk... its fun but tiring. oh well nothing much going on now.. its just werk and home or go party with Noel. He's nice. been There for me.. tho he's my boss. we crack up real good jokes ey... mangen people. hahaha.
Well now i'm breathing on my own and i feel so nice to be standing on my two feets and Not know whats happening tommorrow, i know its weird to think abt tomorrow but it is nice not knowing about it. Met Elfe today at starfucks bugis... gave the designs... it was superb.. POTENTIAL! she's the best.... ELFE is the best... i'm gonna show that this girl can do MAGIC with her designs... will be up soon... we (No Direction) are currently trying to do our buttons done... and than will start recording very soon. so will Keep you guys updated... and to those guys who hates us so much than i'm sorry but we're back to irritate you people.. sorry... we just can't stop... but heh... we're BACCCCKKKKKKkkk
hahahaha

Cheers To all!! HAve TO CHEERS TO ELFE... You're The BEST! never lose hope.... peace out bebeh!

This is ME NOW!

2004-09-14T04:33:00.000-07:00

I was a naive young man

How was I to know

That hidden by her cloak

Of beauty so warm

Was a shadow of cold darkness

Yet she pulled me in with desire

She pulled me in with her love fire

I was helpless against her power

This precious flower -

Then in an instant all was lost

My heart she tossed right onto the floor

She threw me back like a fisherman would

As if for her I was not good

How could I have been so damned foolish

A girl like that never satisfied

A living hell she hopefully finds

Her soul eating her from inside Too good for just one man, until she realizes

All men are too good for her!
I'm no longer so naive -

I've grown around my mistake

Or rather, has it grown around me?

Actions and Words

2004-09-12T22:06:00.000-07:00

hah! is this the real thing? Are you sure this is the real Thing? well now i'm fine with myself having fun at work, at least its not temporary. Like some people who are saying things abt me tru their blog wahhaha... Yeah blame it on me.. all the fuck you want. Yeah i'm the Abusive one you say. well who put me to it. who is the one forcing me?WHO? you fucking tell me now. you think you're so special? ahaha you make me sick. Is this the way you prove to people? You act like you're so innocent... well EVERYFUCKINGBODY know who you are. you plan for people you make them sick, you make them cry you make them change. its like you're taking aver their body. Who the hell are you to do so... I feel sorry for you. You wanna be the centre of everything knowing alot of things. Look at yourself in the mirror ARE YOU HER!!!!!???

SHE FUCKING DIED ON ME BACK IN 2002! Who took her away? Where did you go my love? Who is this Demon in your body? WHO!??! you dun even know who you are? You're a lost soul searching.....For Whom? ME? i shall not agree. I shall NO MORE RESERVE my love... No More For YOU!

Am i going the right way? Oh God Forgive me and her... End It!

2004-09-07T01:11:00.000-07:00

I had a dream, which was not all a dream.The bright sun was extinguish'd, and the stars Did wander darkling in the eternal space, Rayless, and pathless, and the icy earth Swung blind and blackening in the moonless air;Morn came, and went and came, and brought no day,And men forgot their passions in the dread Of this desolation; and all hearts Were chill'd into a selfish prayer for light:And they did live by watchfires - and the thrones,The palaces of crowned kings, the huts, The habitations of all things which dwell, Were burnt for beacons; cities were consumed, And men were gathered round their blazing homes To look once more into each other's face; Happy were those who dwelt within the eye Of the volcanos, and their mountain-torch: A fearful hope was all the world contain'd; Forest were set on fire but hour by hour They fell and faded and the crackling trunks Extinguish'd with a crash and all was black. The brows of men by the despairing light Wore an unearthly aspect, as by fits The flashes fell upon them; some lay down And hid their eyes and wept; and some did restTheir chins upon their clenched hands, and smiled;And others hurried to and fro, and fed Their funeral piles with fuel, and looked up With mad disquietude on the dull sky, The pall of a past world; and then again With curses cast them down upon the dust, And gnash'd their teeth and howl'd: the wild birds shriek'd,And, terrified, did flutter on the ground, And flap their useless wings; the wildest brutesCame tame and tremolous; and vipers crawl'd And twined themselves among the multitude, Hissing, but stingless, they were slain for food:And War, which for a moment was no more, Did glut himself again; a meal was bought With blood, and each sate sullenly apart Gorging himself in gloom: no love was left; All earth was but one thought and that was death,Immediate and inglorious; and the pang Of famine fed upon all entrails men Died, and their bones were tombless as their flesh;The meagre by the meagre were devoured, Even dogs assail'd their masters, all save one,And he was faithful to a corpse, and kept The birds and beasts and famish'd men at bay, Till hunger clung them, or the dropping dead Lured their lank jaws; himself sought out no food,But with a piteous and perpetual moan And a quick desolate cry, licking the hand Which answered not with a caress, he died. The crowd was famish'd by degrees; but two Of an enormous city did survive, And they were enemies; They met beside The dying embers of an altar-placeWhere had been heap'd a mass of holy things For an unholy usage; they raked up, And shivering scraped with their cold skeleton hands The feeble ashes, and their feeble breath Blew for a little life, and made a flameWich was a mockery; then they lifted up Their eyes as it grew lighter, and Each other's aspects. saw, and shriek'd, and died, beheld Even of their mutual hideousness they died, Unknowing who he was upon whose brow Famine had written Fiend. The world was void,The populous and the powerful was a lump, Seasonless, herbless, treeless, manless, lifeless, A lump of death, a chaos of hard clay. The rivers, lakes, and ocean stood still, And nothing stirred within their silent depths; Ships sailorless lay rotting on the sea, And their masts fell down piecemeal; as they dropp'd They slept on the abyss without a surge The waves were dead; the tides were in their grave,The moon their mistress had expired before; The winds were withered in the stagnant air, And the clouds perish'd; Darkness had no need Of aid from them. She was the universe

Bah.... You're a FUCKING ANIMAL! nice?? hmmph

2004-09-02T22:03:00.000-07:00

Cut it out- your self-inflicted pain
Is getting too routine
The crowds are catching on
To the self-inflicted song
Well, here we go again
The art of acting weak
Fall in love to fail
To boost your cd sales
(and that cd sells- yeah, what a hit)
You?ve got to repeat it
You gotta? sink to swim
If at fist you don?t succeed
You gotta recreate your misery
?cause we all know art is hard
Young artists have gotta starve
Try, and fail, and try again
The comforts of repetition
Keep churning out those hits
?til it?s all the same old shit
Oh, a second verse!
Well, color me fatigued
I?m hiding in the leaves
In the cd jacket sleeves
Tired of entertianing
Some double-dipped meaning
A soft serve analogy
This drunken angry slur
In thirty-one flavors
You gotta? sink to swim
Immerse yourself in rejection
Regurgitate some sorry tale
About a boy who sells his love affairs
You gotta? fake the pain
You better make it sting
You?re gonna? break a leg
When you get on stage
And they scream your name
"oh, cursive is so cool!"
You gotta sink to swim
Impersonate greater persons
?cause we all know art is hard
When we don?t know who we see

What, drawn and talk of peace? I hate the word

2004-09-02T21:36:00.000-07:00

Haven't been writing for a while now,

Everything's fine meet more and more people now.. I love the new changed me. but i hate myself for letting her go. Maybe i just didn't have a choice... Life would be better if every individuals have a choice to make for their own. "Thought she was the one..." Isn't that too fucking common... fuck hell man... What we need in this world is NOT to find the one... FOR THE ONE IS CORRUPTED! ..... so now i am pleased to say that i'm NOT finding the one, WHY?, cause every Pretty bitch is the one. I just wanna find her. just her... no one else. and i'm proud to say.... i still haven't... but playing around being naughty is not wrong ey? maybe even flirting. but where will all of that end up? more pain? more losses? well thats all just words losing hurting... we will never know the real feeling of pain. WHAT THE FUCK IS PAIN ANYWAYS? pain is letting the one go? if thats it than i'll say FUCK YOU! cause thats not pain. PAIN is when you thought you are gonna grow old with some bitch and it can't happen.... Are we fooling ourselfs or are we being fooled? if we are being fooled than who the fuck is messing with our feelings? right now so many questions yet NO FUCKING RIGHT ANSWER. or maybe there is maybe its just because i refuse to understand cause its not what i wanna hear.... what do i really wanna hear than. Like how romeo was taken away from his one true love... is that fair... well the story is not abt being fair and yes i know. am not shakespeare. well maybe its just ME!?! i have a decision now... which was taken away from me a long tym back. now i'm afraid to make one... but i still have to... and now its done. enough said. DECISION DONE!

we'll see who's at the losing end... even if it takes to kill ME!

My child is yet a stranger in the world,
She hath not seen the change of fourteen years.
Let two more summers wither in their pride,
Ere we may think her ripe to be a bride

The New Person Behind This Monster

2004-08-25T04:11:00.000-07:00

hey guys, been awhile... Been tired with work. But its all cool. Got to meet my Wonder Woman yesterday. It was all good. This feeling I'm having everytime I call her and everytime I'm talking to her is so new...Good?....Definitely. Love everything abt her... It's like so cool! ahhah would be seeing her this Saturday before the gig or after. That is IF everything turns out well... Its just the smile... It makes me be another person.... And its good. Things are better for me now... Got myself a life and something to do full time. Appreciated and Respect....Even Love. Which is how I feel is good. I'm opened now to all this. Which I will go on. Anyways dear.. I hope you and Mommy love the chicken porridge.. I'll do more than that for the both of you!.. ahha

cheers guys.

Slow Dancing with Zero Arrogance is only With You.

Unforgivable Sinner

2004-08-19T22:15:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was good, suppose to meet up with My Wonder Woman but it was canceled cause she had to go fight EVIL. Spidey needs to rest and watch Singapore Idol. Supposingly me and My Wonder Woman in the office, cosy, nice, maybe even romantic.... but it didn't happen cause she was caught up with some villian.hahah wasn't feeling to good this week down with a flu but she's makes me feel better everytime we talk on the phone... muahaha hope you're in your cloud yesterday night rest. Will be meeting her on Sunday to catch Catwomen. one of our old friends hahahaha... just me and her... looking forward to it. Everything seems fine now. finally taking my steps back to the ground and not looking back at what i was back than, and Whom i was backing away. The monster can go kill whoever she wants, as long she don't kill My Wonder Women. No Direction will be playing on 28th Aug at N.U.S. and i heard that there's another gig happenning at substation. well we'll see the turn up. Playing along side with SUPER BANDS like "Kate Of Kale (WooHoo), 20 DisChanger (WAAHHHUUUU) and MY Squared Circle (YaaHOOO).

My Quote: I don't wanna impress or entertain ANYONE anymore, cause they will never APPRECIATE the EFFORT i put into my stuffs... so SCREW WHATEVER PEOPLE THINKS! I live my own life. MINE! and hopefull with wonderwoman.

CHEERS!

An ANIMAL that lost its way....

2004-08-16T22:42:00.000-07:00

You're like an ANIMAL losing strength forgetting who you were why are you here... look at what you've done? laughter can take away the pain now but not when you're 6 feet under. Had the best conversation with fizah yesterday night. we talked and talked and talked...mostly crap. Never had a conversation with a girl and had so much fun before. Even when i was still with my ex- Sofin this never happened. i'm really happy i found her. A smart one. The conversation Tru her webcam and everything was so fine. I really liked it when you do all the funny faces... But still my heart hurts knowing that something bad has happened and that thing will be hold up till your death. It'll take it to the grave..... the grave..

I can't stop the monster i've created......

The Audition!

2004-08-13T20:23:00.000-07:00

Today is Girl fest! Better Than Run is playing... havent practiced... i feel so weak. Today is my Lovely Fizah's audition how i wish i can be in two places at one time... its so hard... anyways dear if you're reading this... my fingers are crossed for you. You go be the best! And i'm sorry for the other day. Won't ever happen again.

The day after tomorrow

2004-08-13T03:37:00.000-07:00

Today I saw something I shouldn't have. It hurt me straight. But I'm happy. Happy of the outcome. I was feeling down the whole day today. I feel myself together in the ground till my bro Noel, Jerome and Giles pull me back up and said You're still special. That really put a smile back to my face. But still no matter what it still hurts. Went over to my Dear Jenmin's place today. She put a smile on my face straight away. Wow... She is so cute.... Hemp.. Well after that I went back straight to the office and all my bro's are there... The TEAM! Felt good. Everybody was smiling. Yet I'm still frowning. Till my sis Lynn realize and gave me a hug. Which I appreciate a lot... Felt better... Woo!!!

When love is once lost it can never be replaced. She died.

Rest in Peace my LOVE! I miss you

Since The World Loses Its Life

2004-08-11T21:16:00.000-07:00

Another day today, still the same faces the same type of people. I'm like someone who's laughing at everyone around me for making me something here. Got an event today (AGAIN)which I love to do.... But still when I go to places that friends usually hang out people look at me differently which I think its because of my past that they heard. I'm not proud of myself for the things that I've done but its already been done. And I won't try to change the way those people look at me.
I CAN'T. And I WON'T. Still now I'm a new me. A new person no more in disguise. I don't love myself but am loving someone else, something else. with less pride and glory i will still take more steps to move my ways. Don't think of me of who i was in the past.

Words aren't spoken, words are BROKEN!

And i WON'T be the one changing those words for me. cause it is ME!

Mariam

2004-08-11T04:02:00.000-07:00

Hey just watched this show called PONTIANAK it's so sad, loved the show. Wrote something for the PONTIANAK pity her... she was so innocent anyways....it goes like this My Dear Mariam... The Premadona.... You used to dance and sing and everybody melts to hear and see the face of their one and only beauty queen. now she's gone, may she rest in peace. altho its only a movie i feel for her. the pain she went tru... The life she didn't plan to.

R.I.P Mariam

The Road that leaves me hanging!?!

2004-08-11T03:30:00.000-07:00

Now i am always here, keeping myself entertained and am sick of my fake smiles. thank god i met my darling lynette makes me feel myself *tho she makes fun of me* but yet it is all super good... and now i'm werking in another company and i'm feeling more at home and appreciated. And everyone here RESPECT ONE ANOTHER and yes i feel lonely at time but i'm still good. Chatted with Juliana the other day on msn and she asked me hows life and who am i dating now, and i was shocked cause i really am not dating anyone. which now i do not want to think abt it.. if it comes it comes... if it happens it happens.... love that i have for the special someone is here. but something is telling me that its right to do so yet wrong to know so. YES i'm bloody confused but i have to face it and be strong just to take another step in another day.

Long Distance transmission

2004-08-06T21:42:00.000-07:00

The wonders what people have just by looking at you!...

i've been so busy with work....( Fun Fun Fun....) its all good its all good.. been missing a few peeps. they left without a word...disappeared....*poof* or did i distance myself. People have alot to say abt me now.. people who i don't even know and its getting on my nerve...

"Don't you ever judge me, Stay the hell away from me"